I like the idea of romance, but I don’t have a clue how to “be” romantic–which makes it incredibly difficult for the husband, who is a romantic to his core. We were discussing it this past weekend, how clear it is that I am not the romantic in the relationship, and that while his favorites are romantic comedies, I always lean toward action thrillers or sci fi. He liked to read poetry; I would rather poke my own eye out than do that.
I feel bad about it sometimes. I’ve read self-help books and read romance novels, I’ve watched the movies, but the essence of being romantic still eludes me. It just doesn’t occur to me naturally, and when I try, it feels stilted and clumsy (and usually doesn’t work). But maybe that’s because I’m trying to match an idyll of romantic that just doesn’t fit who I am.
I am not a dainty person. My dreams have always been filled with chaos and danger and mayhem. I spent years in a cocoon of self-doubt and lack of self worth, until I broke free and emerged into the strong, self-sufficient, and mostly confident woman people see today.
You know what I think is romantic?
- Holding hands (granted, mine are often either iceberg cold or clammy these days, but that’s beside the point)
- Picking something up at the store, not because your loved one asked, but just because you know they’ll like it
- Talking and laughing with the husband.
I think all the little things that we do every day for the people we love are romantic gestures that get overlooked. Granted, I don’t feel that doing laundry is especially romantic, but washing his favorite shirts because I know he’s going to want to wear them just might be.
So, what do you think? Am I alone in thinking this? Or am I missing the boat completely on being romantic?
This inquiring mind would like to know…
Categories: Random Thoughts